my journey through
starting my own business,
(in)fertility & adoption
The Boho Girl header illustrations were created by artist Erin Darcy. See more of her work at Starving Artist Ink.
a really yummy drive home
The winner is #128 … Nina Gilbert from The Whole Self!
Its so very rare that someone I know personally is chosen by Random.org. My heart is full. I love you Nina Beana. Enjoy your magical-mermaid-seahorse-wonder-dress. xo
{{Grateful to those that entered…and don’t forget that all of my readers get 20% off Hornytoad purchases and they now do international shipping!!}}
“Any mermaid would be happy to pack the Seahorse Dress in her conch shell. Made from a soft and silky jersey knit that doesn’t mind getting wet and dries super easily, it’s a natural for a day that includes having fun on both water and land. Details like an internal shelf bra, fetching Y-racerback and movement-loving a-line silhouette are a bridge between life lived outdoors and around town.”
What makes me happiest about this GIVEaway is that this means Spring and Summer are so so close! This is a dreamy dress (the name alone is dreamy) by Hornytoad and the perfect accessory for sunny watery fun.
We bought a sweet retro speed boat some months ago and are so thrilled to take it out on our bay once we fix a few things. THIS is the dress I’m going to wear for its comfort, flow, support and ability to get wet!! Everything I own from Hornytoad is such good good quality that holds up in the wash, is practical and beautiful and most of all COMFY.
This dress comes in three colors: Black, Lapis and Nectar (shown in images above).
{{Don’t forget that all of my readers get 20% off Hornytoad orders with code: bohogirl}}
*Hornytoad now ships internationally!!
rock made by mccabe russell
Its a constant practice knowing this deep. This weekend it will be my mantra.
I am enough.
You are enough.
Have a blessed weekend.
I simply adore this capture of my sweet boys. It was morning and the sun was coming through the window. Cedar put the song “All Together Now” by the Beatles on the iPad and asked Boho Boy to dance with him. This is a regular occurrence but I rarely get a chance to capture it because I join in.
I love their connection. They share a similar sense of humor and it makes for a house full of a lot of laughter. My husband is that person that uses his wit and humor to ease tense situations and I am beginning to see Cedar doing that as well.
For example: Its not easy to get Cedar out of the bathtub when he is so into his watery world. Boho Boy finds ways to creatively inspire Cedar’s feet to step out of the tub. A few nights ago, Cedar was playing with the cow (below) in the water and named it “Cow-shark”. So Carsten gently grabbed it and said “Cow-shark is going to get youuuuu!” and out hopped Cedar out of the tub and they ran around the house; Cow-shark chasing Cedar as a trail of wet drenched our hardwood floor. Whatever it took! So later that evening, Boho Boy left us for a bit to ran some errands and decided to take a photo of Cow-shark wherever he went. Cedar could barely breathe he was laughing so hard when I showed him daddy’s photos via text message.
Introducing, Cow-shark {taken by Boho Boy’s phone}…
a walk in my sister’s almond orchard
In Blackwater Woods
“Look, the trees
are turning
their own bodies
into pillars
of light,
are giving off the rich
fragrance of cinnamon
and fulfillment,
the long tapers
of cattails
are bursting and floating away over
the blue shoulders
of the ponds,
and every pond,
no matter what its
name is, is
nameless now.
Every year
everything
I have ever learned
in my lifetime
leads back to this: the fires
and the black river of loss
whose other side
is salvation,
whose meaning
none of us will ever know.
To live in this world
you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it
against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go.”
~ Mary Oliver, New and Selected Poems, Vol. 1
**************
Words from Mary that have reached deep inside my bones and offered my heart rest this week. This indeed has been a year of burning fires within and rivers of loss, only to find salvation, find my TRUTH on the other side. Its been a year of holding close to my bosom and clinging onto those last strings of hope and then, letting go of that which I love deeply but doesn’t serve my heart. And yes every year of my life is filled with this but this past year seemed to be that of deeper layers of burning, raging, surrendering and flowing with it all. Perhaps because it wasn’t just about me but also about my son, who I am so deeply connected to and being along side his own journey. It was about the growing pains of my husband and I learning to be his advocate by paying attention to, listening to, protecting and honoring his unique rhythm despite the selflessness this would require, despite the judgment of some that we trusted with our vulnerability.
Its been deeply humbling and empowering to find my own voice, for myself and as a mother. It didn’t come simply for a people-pleaser like me. This past year I’ve had a greater awareness of how deeply I desire to be liked and loved and accepted by all that come into my life and when I am not, it causes self doubt. I’ve seen clearer how these parts of myself led me to putting others needs and ideas before mine or my family in a damaging and unhealthy way. I’m slowly breaking free from those peacemaker ways. I am still nurturing the pieces left by gently putting myself back together again, with tenderness and a gentle wildness, as I rise and stand firmer and firmer, taller and taller.
In all the books I’ve read about parenting a child with unique needs, one thing that is consistent is the importance of circling you and your child with those that trust, honor and respect your choices and desire the same for your child that you do. I am so deeply blessed that this journey with Cedar has attracted a gentle circle of supportive souls around us.
I know all parents travel this journey within their own unique stories. Our children inspire us to find our own voices, inspire us to trust our own intuition and to let go of that which doesn’t bring peace into our lives. This is how they teach us.
sunbeams, blossoms and healing
I feel… (Ik voel, ik voel, wat jij niet voelt…) from Elsbeth van Noppen on Vimeo.
A blog reader sent this to me because it made her think of Cedar. I am moved so deeply. I feel a kindredness with these children. I know many of you will too. No more words, just watch…you will see.
{Thank you, Ramona}