Boho Girl

Yesterday my boys and I took the ferry over to Lummi Island. Its such an enchanting and magical place. When we spend time there, we continue to find such beautiful offerings from the sea: stones, shell pieces, sea glass, colorful seaweed and driftwood. I plan to create a couple of art pieces from our finds for our home and also will send pieces to some dear ones in my life. Oh how I enjoy those moments when my boys and I are side by side but in our own little creative zone, listening to the shore coming in and gazing at the mist surrounding. This is one of my most favorite places.

New Years Eve is tomorrow and as it approaches, I find myself moving into this new space, new age of consciousness with a deeper awareness of self, of my family and each of our needs. 2012 for me was a time to cocoon with my family, to let go of so much in my life that didn’t feel in alignment with what me or my family needed and to keep it simple by being as present as I could for my boys. This meant being away from the screen as much as possible and close to nature and flesh. It meant remembering how life flowed before social media and finding a rhythm that felt safer and cozier for my heart in regards to how, why, what and with whom I shared my heart. It was my year of quiet, gentle, safe, listening, paying deep attention and inner, inner, inner work.

All of this leads me to my next post to come (in a few days) written by both me and a dear soul in my life. We talk about walking through darkness and what darkness means for each of us. A different perspective on it entirely. Both her and I let go of so much in our life in 2012: ways of feeling, thinking and believing, relationships and social medias, that no longer felt life bringing and with that there is grief and longing and unraveling and renewing and rebirthing. I look forward to sharing it with you.

Until then, I will think of all of you as me and my boys and my dear brother in law and his new wife gather around the bonfire on New Years Eve as the moon and stars shine down on us and we let go, let go, let go and create intentions for 2013.

Boho Brother got married!!

I have a feeling hearts will be breaking all over blogland. ; ) We’ve received so many lovely and brave emails over the years from blog readers confessing their crushes on our dear Boho Bro. We fully understood why as his energy can be felt even across the screen. I’ve been honored to be his sister and witness the unique and beautiful soul he is. He’s taken such gentle care of himself out in the woods, communing in nature over the last handful of years and has finally found an earth goddess to join him. To frolic free in Mother Nature, create art with natural elements and be each other’s soul medicine. They refer to themselves as the “dragonfly couple” because of their connection to dragonflies. I adore that so.

The ceremony was yesterday, on Christmas Eve in the afternoon up top a waterfall in the woods. Boho Boy was the officiant, which made it so deeply special for each of us. Very intimate, earthy, simple and spiritual. Boho Bro made his bride a nature crown. She tied a feather into his hair. He surprised her with fairy dust to sprinkle around them. They faced North, South, East and West. They drank water from the rushing waterfall behind them in the raven cups we gave them as a gift. They surrounded themselves in clam shells they found around our bay and used them as tea light holders. The shells were sent back to the elements by Boho Bro setting them free to swim down the waterfall when the ceremony was finished. We shared German champagne from their mother and toasted to their father whose own free spirit would have been so proud of this moment. Mmmmm…

But my favorite moment was when he howled at the moon as she wept and giggled into his shoulder. So organic and true.

And it was FREEZING and they were barefoot and I love them for that. ; )

We wanted to share this precious gift with you in the spirit of Christmas. Merry Christmas to all. Warmth, peace and a covering of unconditional love to each of you and your families.

When I was asked by the lovely Sas to be part of this project, it felt so so good in my bones. I have been trying to be really conscious about how much I can give right now in my life based on the reserves I have left after being present with what is in front of me. As I have shared here before, saying no in order to take care of myself and my family has been something I have had to learn. But this project gave me that burning in the belly and I knew my voice had a place here. I said yes and I am so glad I did. I am moved by Sas and her desire to help women who want to heal their body relationship. My relationship to my body has been a spiritual journey all on its own…as it continues to be.

These collection of stories about women and their relationship to their bodies is so deeply real and moving and from various perspectives. I was reading through them in the middle of the night in bed, taking deep breaths, wiping my tears, sighing big sighs and feeling so not alone and validated. I found my own ache and celebration and freedom in each of their stories. What we all need, yes?

You can download the free PDF The Body Stories here.

Just wanted to share some images of the last few weeks. Really sinking into this season. Cocooning within the warmth of our home. I am so dearly in love with our sweet little Christmas tree. Its my favorite of all.

Been preparing our hearts and home for our dear brother (Boho Brother) to come out for two weeks with his love. It will be my first time meeting her in the flesh. Such a special time with them as we get to share Solstice, a full moon, Christmas and New Years together!

Omi left a few days ago and was here for a week. We are so grateful how our family is so sensitive to Cedar’s need for less crowded spaces. At my sister’s farm during Thanksgiving, we were given a huge beautiful room upstairs to go to when he needed quiet and my mother in law opted to come out earlier in December so that Cedar would have more space throughout holiday visits. I am moved to tears by our family and their support this year.

I would love to hear your plans for Solstice, Christmas and New years.

Yesterday, Cedar whispered to me that he needed quiet but wanted me to join him. So we tip toed upstairs and I tucked him into our bed. I laid near him just marinating in the quiet. The shifting rhythm of the holidays has been a lot for him, for all of us. Us visiting family, family visiting us, the house transformed into sparkly twinkle newness. This transition and this shifting, this “change” that this holiday brings is something I am more aware of than I have ever been in my life.

A dear friend of mine has reminded me the importance of asking for what you need and that can be done in so many ways. Just the awareness of our needs alone is a journey in and of itself. Cedar has been a reminder…sometimes fierce reminder, sometimes a gentle one: of how important it is to simply ask. Whether its a howl or a whisper…to just ask for what we need. I need quiet. I need alone time. I need the lights off. I need to be held. I need less talking across the table. All things Cedar has learned to ask for. All things I am remembering that I need too. And even if I am unable to have those things in the moment I need them, just knowing I need them alone gives me permission to be gentler on myself and others.

Lykke Li & Bon Iver

Tonight my husband pulled me into his office and told me to put his huge earphones on and said “Here is some inspiration for you honey…she has amazing musicality!”

He had this video up for me to watch. Oh my. Inspired indeed.

Wanted to share. Mmmmm…enjoy.