- Wednesday, September 14, 2011
- Posted in enoughness,self love

Tomorrow I turn 40. I feel just as much excitement and anticipation as when I turned 30. I’ve never been one to freak out about age, really…to me it is just a number. I remember someone telling me that your 30′s are all about discovering who you really are and your 40′s are the beginning of being comfortable with who you are the rest of your life. This may not be true for everyone but reflecting back, it feels true for me. I think this is why these milestone ages didn’t frighten me. I have always so longed to be comfortable in my skin.
Boho Boy had a discussion with his acupuncturist the other day about how our American culture views age and how different it is to how it is viewed in the Asian culture. You often hear in our culture “I feel old” or “I can’t do that or wear that because I am too old!”. There is such a negative connotation on the idea of aging in those statements. So much of how we view ourselves is how we will end up feeling and being. What if getting old, being old, was a celebration? What if we all looked forward to it? What if it was an AWESOME thing to be old? Then on the days we are feeling good and sassy and deliciously comfy in our skin, we would say...”I am SO old! Yay!!” ; ) In the Asian culture and perhaps others I am unaware of, it seems age is less limiting and just more of an opportunity to create and embrace the abundance in your life.
I want to embrace this concept. As I see the gray hairs peeking through in this photo above, what if rather than wince and cover up, I celebrate them as silver ribbons in my hair? I see long gray dreads in my future.
Tomorrow morning I get on a plane for a wee one night groovy getaway. I plan on doing a lot of reading, window shopping, drinking a cocktail or two, getting a bit pampered and SLEEPING. All stuff I can’t quite do right now as a mama without interruption.
Here’s to glorious gray hairs and uninterrupted fun! Getting older rocks.
xo





















September 14, 2011
Blessings on you for a very happy 40th birthday, Denise.
September 14, 2011
Oh lady- this is exquisite! <3
September 15, 2011
thank you for this, for taking the pity party out of another year around the sun that i’m feeling…i love that we share a birthday and tomorrow, when i’m laying on my acupuncturist table, i’m going to say ‘yay! today i’m older’
and i’m going to think of you on your mini getaway and i’ll say a toast to you and me.
xoxoxo
September 15, 2011
happy birth-day + wish-making day, beauty-full you.
hearts + hugs + hoopla,
meghan
September 15, 2011
Happy birthday! I love what you wrote, and I read something similar once in an interview with Michelle Pfeiffer, when asked about her age and whether she worries about it. She said no, and that to her, growing older is a privilege. Whenever I find myself moaning about getting older I think of that, and I am suddenly grateful for the signs of aging because it simply means I’m still here; and to live each day is a blessing. Sometimes I forget that, but reading a post like yours reminds me, and seeing you and how your beautiful life is flourishing, makes me happy. I’ll be 40 next year, and if I can rock it half as fabulously as you, I will enter this new decade thrilled to bits!
Enjoy you well deserved pampering break!
xxx
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday! You’re beautiful, dahling!!
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday!!! May your trip be blessed <3
September 15, 2011
Happy birthday to you, beauty! I would never, ever have guessed you were turning 40 because you defy all those stereotypes you just described. You radiate such a happiness, such a beauty in your own skin… the word I think of when I think of you is VERVE. Yes. xoxox!
September 15, 2011
I am not sure forty has ever looked so hawt! Happy birthday, gorgeous.
September 15, 2011
Toot toot!!!!! Happy Birthday!!!!! Enjoy your one night getaway and cheers to gray ribbons in our hair! Mwah!
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday fellow virgo! Have a wonderful, relaxing getaway!!
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday lovely Denise! I love this post to pieces. I celebrated a birthday at the beginning of August, and while at dinner with a few friends, one asked me “are you where you thought you would be at this age?” and without thinking, I said “no, and thank goodness for that” (total gut reaction!) I have learned so much about myself and what I want my life to be filled with. This past year has been all about embracing the journey and having faith in the fact that where I end up is exactly where I was meant to be. Your blog has been one of the greatest teachers in this lesson for me. You have such faith and positivity in this learning process we call life and I want to thank you for that. Sending lovely thoughts your way…
September 15, 2011
I love the idea of gray dreads! How hot is that!!!! Happy Bday Girlie! WOOTWOOT!
September 15, 2011
sweet friend, 40 becomes you. you are beautiful, stunningly so. i love that you are crossing this threshold; i look forward to it myself.
happy sacred birthday.
September 15, 2011
Oh bliss, sister-friend. Also 40 soon, I share in the delight of agelessness. Living with no boundary of shoulds or shouldn’ts, we are able to be true to the million year soul that is our truest essence. Your courage and bravery are the fire of youth and I celebrate our connection even when much time has passed. May the first year of the new decade be BLISS!
One Love…that’s all there is…especially within.
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday!
September 15, 2011
really beautiful…happy birthday!!!
September 15, 2011
you are one of the most beautiful people, inside and out. you radiate such light and love and comfort – and i know you touch so many of us with your nurturing heart. have the dreamiest, yummiest, most gorgeous birthday ever. xo.
September 15, 2011
Happy birthday!
September 15, 2011
Happy birthday!
My circle of friends says some version of, “I’m old!” all the time, but I think we all — or at least I — mean it quite happily. I’m too old for pop music, thank GOD, because that stuff is terrible. I’m too old for team sports, which I didn’t enjoy, anyway. I’m too old to sit on a hard floor without cushions, so I get the big comfy couch instead! Yay!
Anyway, all that to say it’s not just a cultural thing, it’s an individual thing. My time in Japan several years ago actually led me to believe that that culture is far more obsessed with youth than American culture is. It just manifests in different ways.
September 15, 2011
happy birthday for tomorrow!
i like this take on aging. as much as sometimes i get freaked out at being as old as i am (i am not immune to this culture just yet!) i can say with much certainty that i wouldn’t want to be my 21 year old self again. we become so much richer and aware and kinder the older we get, i find i love more easily now, and that i am more open. these are things worth celebrating! thank you for sharing your thoughts here.
September 15, 2011
As my 40th birthday looms too, and the silver fairy threads in my dreads become ever more apparent, I enjoy reading that others are also coming into themselves in their middle (not old) age. Happy Birthday Denise! I love your blog and your photographs and your all round gorgeousness!
September 15, 2011
I hope you have had the most wonderful day for your birthday! I don’t think I believed the old adage that ‘life begins at forty’ until I went through mine. I turned 50 this year and for me, things have only continued to get better and better.
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday!!
September 15, 2011
Have a wonderful birthday!
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday! The 40′s ARE fabulous, so enjoy. My gray “highlights” and laugh lines just help to tell my story
Celebrate everyday
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday!! I hope you have an awesome love soaked day!
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday, 40 looks great on you! I am in my early thirties and have quite a few silver strands myself. I have been contemplating coloring, but for now am leaving them as they are, natural, beautiful and a testament to my ever broadning wisdom as I age. Enjoy your relaxation and sleep. Everyone deserves it, especially tired Mom’s!
September 15, 2011
feliz cumpelaños, querida. i turned 40 in july, and it felt (still feels) like a sacred initiation into my fullness. yes, absolutely glorious. may you celebrate and be celebrated. xo
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday Denise!!!!! XO
September 15, 2011
Here I was thinking I was the only “weirdo” who was excited about aging. I think gray hairs are beautiful. I’ve yet to earn one, but I’m blonde and so I think it may take longer.
I, too, anticipate gray dreads in my future. I think that sounds absolutely lovely. Beautiful. Amorous. Cheers to another year, and to feeling comfortable in your skin.
xoxox
September 15, 2011
Denise,
I turned 50 in July, and someone very close to me took my face in her hands, kissed my forehead, gazed at me a very VERY long time, then said, ‘Congratulations. You look your age.’ I laughed, but she said what she meant by that was that all the learning, the transitions, the changes, the pain and challenges, the lessons, the love, the openness and willingness to grow as, into, the woman I am, was written not just on my face, but evident in my eyes. Wow.
And so I take that phrase, with that exact sentiment, and turn it to you. “Congratulations! You look your age!”
Much much appreciation for you and this space you’ve created here, all these years.
Toni
September 15, 2011
buon compleanno, bella!
September 15, 2011
Tanti auguri a te beautiful lady. I hope you do enjoy your day.
September 15, 2011
Happy birthday, lovely! Have a fantastic time celebrating. I would have guessed that you were a Virgo (although I also may have guessed Taurus!). I hope you have a beautiful birthday!
September 15, 2011
Beautiful Denise……I am too a Denise who just turned 40, and I have blissfully accepted that age is nothing but a thing!! I just love reading your blog and have finally decided to reach out to you. Your words inspire me and make me smile. Cheers to you on your birthday. xoxo
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday beautiful Denise! I hope you’re having a marvelous day!
September 15, 2011
happy happy 40th birthday, denise! i so agree with all that was said in this post! i have always disliked the way we “talk” about ageing…….and so many i know, seem to just grow old because of their age…..i did a post on this very same thing…but turning 50! http://pearlsandroses-nonnie.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2010-07-04T11%3A41%3A00-07%3A00&max-results=50 celebrate life! 30-40-50-60-70 etc…..and live life to the fullest!!! enjoy your little get-a-way……and enjoy the blessings of being 40! xoxo
September 15, 2011
Have a lovely day Denise Happy birthday today, My twin and I celebrated our 58 birthday on the 8th September. I am not worried at all about my age, I just try and do as much as I can. Hope Cedar is getting better. I love looking at your blog and even more so since you moved. Please can you post more photos of your garden and surrounding area. Are you going to do a veggie plot?
September 15, 2011
Happy 40th birthday, Denise. Very best wishes to you. Enjoy your me-time x
September 15, 2011
Happy 40th birthday beautiful mama xx
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday Sister Virgo, Denise! My birthday is Saturday! I remember how excited I was to turn 40! You are going to love it! Of course there are still struggles at times but the attitude is much different. Have a wonderful (or maybe by now it’s “I hope you had a wonderful”) birthday adventure. Much love and light to you!
September 15, 2011
Congrats becoming 40! Yay!
Love the way you are dealing with it. ;c)
September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday Fellow Virgo! (i celebrated my 22 birthday this past August)
I have never really understood age, because ever since I was little I would always tell people I want to be old. I enjoy every year of life while it is here but growing up with the women who have raised me has made me view age as a gaining of wisdom and self-assurance. Each journey leads us down a path whose only lessons to be learned are from time spent. Good Luck on your adventure of another year and many more to come.
September 15, 2011
Happy 40th Birthday!!!! Have a wonderful , safe, relaxing trip. I just celebrated my 41 b-day on Labor Day.
September 15, 2011
I am a frequent lurker to your blog. I suppose I just enjoy the way you look at the world. And your post today was just what it took to get me to come out and comment. I have been seeing an abundance of silver hairs cropping up lately. I chalk it up to having four kids, but really I think it’s just hereditary. Some days I think maybe I’ll start coloring my hair, but then I change my mind. I imagine myself in the future as being a little old lady with a head of snowy white hair. I don’t want to be the old lady who dyes her hair, you know? So I hear what you’re saying about being comfortable with your age.
September 15, 2011
Wicked Cool Girl!!! Whoop!!! I LOVE 40, actually I’m 42!! Adore this age!! Embrace, soak it, wear it, draw it, create it, manifest it, love it, jelly with it!!!
Enjoy SiSTar!!
September 16, 2011
Happy Birthday…..
September 16, 2011
happy birthday! today is also my brother’s birthday.
you are so right about what your forties will bring – i am 47 and this has been my best decade so far!
September 16, 2011
Happy Birthday Denise! Hope you have a wonderful day!
September 16, 2011
may we all be so gorgeous and sexy at 40! congrats mama! and so glad your motherhood dreams have come true before you hit this special milestone. fantastic and inspiring post! live it!
September 16, 2011
Happy Birthday, Young Lady! And I mean it! Age means nothing. it’s how you feel on the inside that matters! Enjoy your special day!
September 16, 2011
happy birthday! 40 is awesome!!! i started my dreads at 40. i have quite a few grey hairs, too. i love them though and feel like i earned. i call them my sparkles:)
September 16, 2011
SILVER RIBBONS… a time to celebrate all that you are, and all you are becoming… and that you’re doing it all so very LOVED. happy birthday <3
September 16, 2011
Feliz Cumpleanos, lovely Denise!
I am all for a “here’s to more of the journey ” parties! xo
Did you know that there are cultures where they do not even celebrate birthdays, our count the years?…..My DH was from one of those, and he used to say that the Amercian penchant for counting and labeling ( I am too old, or getting old) was so self-limiting…..he liked looking at life his own way, because it allowed him to ‘just be’…..
Yet, I still think there is a lot to be said for a celebration of 365 more days around the sun…and cake!
September 16, 2011
Happy glorious 40th! Getting older is a beautiful thing…I’ve always loved the idea of growing older and wiser. It’s such a blessing to wake up each morning, one day older, and realize that we’ve been gifted more time to embrace this life. And I’m another one who thinks those strands of gray hair are gorgeous : ). Celebrate!!
September 16, 2011
Happy birthday, gorgeous girl!
September 16, 2011
A bounty of blessings to you, you beauitful, sprite spirit!!
September 16, 2011
I am so truly affected by your willingness to be you, as I’m sure so many have felt…and feel better in my skin from knowing you, however vitual that knowing is
You have given me a kind of permission many days, to listen to that inner whisper and embrace my true self… and I am so grateful for you in the world. Truly. Sending you a soft gentle stream of white light this weekend, as you embrace a new chapter….deep down peace and pure inspiration to you!
Txo
September 16, 2011
Found your blog recently and it sure does make my day. You’re so lovely and I hope you have a fabulous 40th. All the best
September 16, 2011
happy birthday!
and you sure do NOT look 40 my dear!!!
I turn 41 next month. UGH!>
tara
September 16, 2011
HAPPY HAPPY DAY TO YOU. I agree with you on the age being just a number. I turn 50 next year and I am so exited stand it. I have friends when they turned 50 we might as well got the shovel, coffin, an buried them 6 feet. They reflect on how they are to old to often, but I sure do love them. Even if they or older than dirt. I just have to shake my head. I too love my gray hair, they just add highlights and shimmer to my hair. Next yr. I am throwing myself one fun b-day party, because I didn’t think I would live to see 50. ENJOY YOUR “JUST ANOTHER NUMBER” DAY.
September 16, 2011
i love your face, your hair, your attitude. here’s to 40 and happy birthday!!! <3
September 16, 2011
I love this post. I LOVED turning 35, it was such a great year for me. The closer I get to 40 I wonder what that year will bring and if I can embrace it as I did 35. This inspires me to remember getting older isn’t a bad thing.
September 17, 2011
Haha I had to laugh because just last night at choir practice I looked at our oldest member (89) in her super comfy looking matching gray sweatsuit and wondered how old I have to be to start wearing matching sweats in public.
Because I CANNOT WAIT for those years! Happy Birthday!
September 17, 2011
I hope you had a wonderful birthday!
xoxo
September 17, 2011
happiest of birthdays! my mom has the same philosophy about aging – it just gets better and better. i look forward to being in my sixties and content and wise and confident. i can’t wait for the smile lines and crow’s feet, too!
September 17, 2011
YES! I can’t tell you how much I loved reading this and how blessed I feel to have your presence in my life. Everything about this makes me want to do lots of herkies. You are widely celebrated and I am so giddy that your doorway into your forties was filled with so many lovely ways to fill your soul, lovely to witness. You make silver ribbons look HOT. xoxo
September 17, 2011
We should all look and feel so gorgeous at 40. Blessings to you and may this year be more fulfilling than you could have ever imagined. One Love.
September 18, 2011
happy birthday to you!
happy birthday to you!
happy birthday, dear denise!
happy birthday to you!
the gift that comes with that song is that you didn’t have to actually hear me sing it out loud. ha.
anyway, hope this is the beginning of your best year yet.
and that your sweet son is feeling better.
ps: am appreciating your attitude and thoughts about aging. they are a good reminder for me.
September 18, 2011
We share a birthday!! I announced on Facebook how happy & excited I was to be turning 39 and so many people were surprised by my attitude (and that I’m willing to admit my age in public lol). I have a cousin & a sister that have really struggled with moving thru their 30′s & 40′s and I feel a bit sad that they can’t see the joy of celebrating how lucky they are to be growing older & wiser. Ofcourse a small part of me would love to have the body I had at 20 or even just to have the energy & lack of aches/pains but I wouldn’t go back to being 20 for anything. Each year is a blessing! I feel more secure & comfortable & excited about who I am as well as more loving, supportive and open to others. It’s wonderful!
September 19, 2011
Happy birthday, beautiful girl! Can’t wait to hear more about your one-night getaway. What a gift to have that time to just be and to celebrate being you and getting older and more fabulously you. Just this morning, I was telling Kirk that I don’t fear getting older. In fact, I look forward to it. There’s something about age that makes me excited — I think it is the wisdom I hope that I have as I continue to age. So I resonated with a lot of your sentiments here. Here’s to your glorious 40s and beyond! xoxo
September 19, 2011
Your attitude about life is beautiful! I hope you had a wonderful, happy birthday!
September 20, 2011
You are divine!! Happy Birthday!
September 20, 2011
happy, happy birthday
silver ribbons – i LOVE it!
ps: i feel like you look so much like cedar in this picture!
September 20, 2011
Happy birthday wise lady.
C x
September 20, 2011
Here’s a haiku I wrote for you on your special day:
Hi there, here’s my note.
Happy happy birthday, girl!
Joy to you this year.
September 20, 2011
I hope you had the happiest of birthdays, full of peace and blessings.
September 21, 2011
I just recently found your blog… such an amazing site. I love your insight, your observations, your potography, your dreads and your quirky style! Thanks for sharing your life with the world in this way! : ) I hope your 40th was beyond lovely and splendid!
Cheers,
Amy
September 21, 2011
You are right on about the 40′s Denise!
It is an amazing time.
Happy Birthday…many blessings for the year to come!
And have a lovely time away!!!
love and light
October 26, 2011
Embrace the idea of silver/grey dreads. They all have a story to tell and those stories are your truths so embrace them with love.
January 22, 2012
Reading through your “older” post, it’s a joy to discover your thoughts and your prose, very enlightening. I shall visit from France again from time to time. Thank you.