Boho Girl

Slowly, over this past month, Cedar started to not seem like himself. More quiet, sleeping longer, appetite decreasing. He was chewing on his fingers, so we figured it was his two year molars again. Which it was, but there seemed to be more. He began coughing a bit but since he didn’t have a fever, I thought perhaps it was from the drainage of the massive amounts of saliva from his teething. Boho Boy and I always approach our bodies holistically when it comes to wellness. We have always treated Cedar in this way and he seems to have thrived with a strong immune system thus far. With the help of our intuition and wisdom from our herb mama friends and family, we thought it would be soon that we would see an improvement. But it slowly got worse and finally, after two nights of holding him up on my chest all night so he could sleep without coughing and him laying down at the park (photo you see above), I knew I needed to take him to a doctor. I hesitated before because I was not comfortable with the doctor we have for him, who is with our insurance. We felt he wasn’t very present and seemed to have his thoughts on getting to the long line of patients ahead of us.  He also always thought Cedar was a girl when he first walked in the door. I tend to give doctors the benefit of the doubt, especially with insurance in our country these days but it didn’t mean I felt safe with him. I consulted a circle of very wise medicine women and it was almost as if their permission that it was time to go to the doctor helped me get over my own fears and stubbornness about it. I felt so protected because as soon as I called the doctor’s office, they got him in with a cancellation that day and we were fortunate to see another doctor. A beautiful French woman (oooh, la la), who made it clear the minute she sat down with us that she is very conservative with medication for toddlers.  I knew she was right for our family.  We so believe in helping to guide our own bodies with learning how to heal itself rather than relying on medicines that only fix the surface and not the root.  But we also believe, for us, that there is a time to be more aggressive about it and seek the quick-fixing Western approach.  Especially when it comes to Cedar getting enough oxygen.

She listened intently to our story about how we’ve most recently realized the air quality in our home is not at its best and we did a few things that we thought would help…but it seems my husband and I are still suffering from symptoms. Cedar has always had a strong immune system and we were grateful he wasn’t affected but now I was curious if his current symptoms had anything to do with our air quality, which would tell us that it is not fixed. Now we’re thinking the toxicity is deeper into the walls than we thought possible.

She checked Cedar, gently and all over and by the end of what felt like a long process with an emotionally distraught toddler, Cedar was diagnosed with a sinus infection, an ear infection and bronchitis. She told me that she doesn’t see sinus infections in toddlers often. She does see them but just not often and especially in a situation where the entire family has similar symptoms. So, she was the second medical professional to suggest it is the air quality and said it makes perfect sense, as she has treated a few families with the same symptoms as a result from some sort of toxicity in their living environment.

That was it. I phoned my husband in tears and as soon as he heard what Cedar was diagnosed with, he said that’s it. We’re leaving our home. So, its all happening so fast. We’ll be out of here in a month and in the meantime, will be doing all we can to protect and build up our immune systems. Its been so confusing to us how for so long, we have pumped our bodies full of vitamins and elixirs and mists and wholesome foods and yet still feel like we are walking around with the flu. Some days worse than others but it never quite goes away. Part of me wonders if our fertility journey was affected as well. We’ve been in this home for 9 years now.

With all this bigness going on, Cedar is where my heart and soul is. It is so hard to see him not fully himself. He is our first and only and perhaps our ever…and when he hurts, we hurt deep.  So we are treating him both holistically and with antibiotics (and probiotics) and an inhaler.  Lots of herbal rubs and minty baths and setting him upright in bed.

I have been so blessed to have been circled by dear friends that are sending us love and offering their help during this time. There has been mention of “packing parties” and trips to see us so that we can have relief while we pack and begin the process of a new life. I have been sent packages of herbal love and healing rituals, wholesome recipes for me and our family. I feel overwhelmed and not at all alone in this.

One thing that has been a huge comfort for Cedar is a song I sing to him to help him sleep. I wanted to share it with you. I first heard it from a band called Innocence Mission on their lullaby CD “Now The Day is Over”.  The song is called Bye-Lo Baby. You can listen to a bit of the chorus on this page. It is song #11.

What I do is switch the words around to add everyone from my immediate family.  So that he knows he is loved deeply and thought of and protected by all of us. Its pretty guaranteed by the time I reach Cousin Seanzie…he is drifted off into dream land, no matter how poopie he feels. I close my eyes and imagine that family member holding and rocking him in the rocking chair, just like me…and I truly believe he feels them near.

Perhaps there is magic in the song.  The band is from Ireland…the land of Pixies and Faeries, you know.  ; )

I start from oldest to youngest:

• Bye-lo baby.  Bye-lo baby.  Bye-lo baby.  Bye-lo baby bye.
• Mama will love you. Mama will love you. Mama will love you. All of her life.
• Daddy will love you. Daddy will love you. Daddy will love you. All of his life.
• Grandpa Lenny will love you. Grandpa Lenny will love you. Grandpa Lenny will love you. Up in heaven above.
• Vu Vu will love you. Vu Vu will love you. Vu Vu will love you. All of his life.
• Grandmarmie will love you. Grandmarmie will love you. Grandmarmie will love you. All of her life.
• Omi will love you. Omi will love you. Omi will love you. All of her life.
• Auntie DD will love you. Auntie DD will love you. Auntie DD will love you. All of her life.
• Uncle JJ will love you. Uncle JJ will love you. Uncle JJ will love you. All of his life.
• Uncle Jon-Erik will love you. Uncle Jon-Erik will love you. Uncle Jon-Erik will love you. All of his life.
• Auntie Pammie will love you. Auntie Pammie will love you. Auntie Pammie will love you. All of her life.
• Uncle Marky will love you. Uncle Marky will love you. Uncle Marky will love you. All of his life.
• Auntie La La will love you. Auntie La La will love you. Auntie La La will love you. All of her life.
• Cousin Kelly will love you. Cousin Kelly will love you. Cousin Kelly will love you. All of her life.
• Cousin Casey will love you. Cousin Casey will love you. Cousin Casey will love you. All of his life.
• Cousin Seanzie will love you. Cousin Seanzie will love you. Counsin Seanzie will love you. All of his life.
• Bye-lo baby. Bye-lo baby. Bye-lo baby. Bye-lo baby bye.

custom made Lotus Wei elixirs

A few months ago, a friend guided me over to the flower essences of  Lotus Wei.  I was so enchanted with the energy throughout their website.  I was in need of the healing power of nature bottled up, for me to drink in.  Mmmm…aren’t we all?  After I made an order, I was contacted by one of the owners, Katie Hess.  We connected in a gentle, knowing way and Lotus Wei eventually became a sponsor on my blog.  We knew my readers would be drawn to the healing ways of their products the same way I was.

Since becoming a sponsor, Katie has taken such gentle care of our family.  She knew we were all experiencing illness from the poor air quality in our home (that we are quickly remedying, more on that soon).  She asked me to make a list of all of our ailments.  I wasn’t sure what she was going to do with that list, but then I received the most thoughtful care package from her.  I was so teary and moved at the attention and intention she put into our family’s well being.  I know there is a unique and spiritual process when the elixirs, oils and mists are created, which involves a gemstone for more healing properties.  I felt so deeply grateful that she had made each of us our own elixir.  She wrapped up the package with beautiful notes for each of us and chocolate to nourish.  It was one of the most amazing gifts I have ever received.

yummy care package from Katie (and some of the things i had already purchased)

Last week,  both Katie Hess and Lisa Reinhardt (CEO of Wei of Chocolate) were in town and were able to stop by our home for a few hours.  The serendipity of their coming was pretty amazing.  It was the morning after a bit of a rough and emotional night…without a wink of sleep.  Normally, I would pull back from anything social because when I am in a space where emotions are completely at the surface,  I tend to need at least a few days of solitude to get centered again.  Something told me not to pull back but to surrender and open my door, regardless if I wasn’t in the best head space.  The fact that Katie said she wanted to “shower us with flower power” helped. ; )

The minute I opened my door I felt this calm wash over me.  Katie and Lisa gracefully slipped off their shoes and walked in my home.  I felt like the energy between our exchanges was an Om chant.  Just calm, whispery, gentle…as we sat Indian style or lotus position on the floor and shared a bit about ourselves.  What moved me the most was Cedar’s openness to them.  Katie slowly pulled out of her magical bag bottles of elixirs, mists and oils…cards with flowers on them spread out, tiny cups for Cedar to play with…and Lisa handed us healing chocolates that melted on our tongue.  Cedar was drawn to certain flower cards and Katie would mist him with that particular flower essence and he would throw his head back with his eyes closed and fully RECEIVE it.  She rubbed oils on his skin and dropped elixirs on his tongue.

I told a friend the next day that I was awed by his 30 minutes or more of complete calm and sage wisdom with what was transpiring around him.  He seemed like an old soul…like he just got it.  He knew he was being drenched with essence that his body craved.  Essence from earth and he is an earth child.  Observing the sweet kindred connection between them melted my mama heart.

Later in the day I was to meet up with two visiting friends for my first girly date in long over a year. I wasn’t sure when I woke up that morning if I was quite up for it…even though I ached to see them and have some much needed time away from home. I was THAT weary and self conscious about feeling raw. But, but…after a few hours of being in the presence of Katie and Lisa and my body soaking in the healing and my mind releasing the muck and opening up space for peace, I was so open and ready to love and be loved by my girlfriends. So that is PROOF, my friends. It works. My mood was enhanced ten fold and my friends who hung out with me that night can attest to it. I felt closer to the essence of me than I had in a very long time. They told me I smelled like a blossom. I sent them home for their drive back to LA with a chocolate they were drawn to. It was all just so magical and I have Katie and Lisa to thank for blessing me on a day that it was deeply needed.

And Cedar? After eating the Wei Relaxed piece of dark chocolate Lisa gave him right before his nap, I was concerned it might keep him up. It IS chocolate, right? I never give him chocolate. But Katie and Lisa reassured me that it is supposed to help him sleep. So, I surrendered and guess what? He had a three hour nap. Note to all mamas…feed your kids THIS chocolate!! ; )

cedar groovin’

I know I have been so quiet here this past week. I have a juicy story to share and will do so very very soon. My energies have been focused on our wee boy who has been teething his two year molars, pushing through…all at once. The constant drool is causing a lot of congestion and the nights have been long, needing to hold him up on my chest so he can breathe comfortably. He wakes up happy but mama wakes up weary, so I have been trying to rest during his naps.

Until my next post, I wanted to ask you for some music suggestions. I will be going on a road trip in late April with some lovelies and am going to make a few road trip CD’s. Do you have a favorite road trip song(s)?

{Boho Boy and I adore this photo I took of Cedar a few days ago. We love his rhythm and groove}

stacy all wrapped up and loving on her daughter mia & stacy’s daughter isabella, taken with her iPhone

The three winners of one free Gypsy Wrap for last week’s GIVEway are:

• Crystal M
• Karen Maezen Miller
• Mama Gast

Yay! Congrats!! Julie and I will get in touch with you.

And for the rest of you…thank you for entering. Each of you are wrapped up in our gratefulness.

Have a wonderful weekend.  Will post soon about a magical day I had yesterday being drenched in flower essence.

xoxox

terri fischer

erin darcy

pixie campbell

darlene kreutzer

me, self portrait

In celebration of St. Patrick’s Day, Julie is offering three readers a free Gypsy Wrap. May the luck of the Irish be with you!

She is also offering a buy three get one free (chosen by Julie) to the first 10 readers who mention Boho Girl when they complete their purchase on Etsy.

{Samples of some of her wraps are on a few of my friends in the above photos. You can also see them on my boys in my previous post.  Yes, she has them for men and littles too!}

About Julie, the designer…whom I adore to the max:

photo of julie by deb schwedhelm

When I turned 40, the fog started to lift in every aspect of my life. I started paying attention to the long list of things I’d been intending to get to… eventually. On the top of that list was becoming a certified yoga teacher, taking a decade of personal practice and turning it into something I could share with others. I’ve read that all of the “little things” we do in life eventually add up into something “that makes sense.” I’ve found this to be true: merging the strength of my Marine Corps training; the customer service skills from waitressing; my knowledge of anatomy, physiology, disease process from nursing college; my teaching skills from years as a nurse educator; creating a nurturing classroom from mothering four young children; and my sewing skills to keep the hair out of my face.

The last “little thing” took me by surprise as people started to ask about my batik hair wraps. They wanted one — or TEN! Yoga studios started to ask if I would sell them on consignment (and would I sell wholesale? and how could their cousin in Tennessee order some? ).

The Yoga Gypsy LLC, which was started as a traveling yoga business, incorporated wrapping people up in Gypsy Wraps. I am grateful that I found a way share two things I enjoy; yoga and sewing.

Take a look at my shop and wrap up!

terri & julie

GIVEaway Rules:

• 3 Winners receive one Gypsy Wrap of choice.
• Winners will be chosen at Random.org
• To enter, leave a comment on this post
• Comment can be one word or many or just a smiley face
• One comment per person, please
• Comments will be closed Thursday, 10pm PST
• Winners will be announced on Friday

Cedar has dealt with a bit of tactile sensitivity since he was born. First I noticed it with fabrics on his skin needing to be very soft (hence the bamboo and uber soft cottons we buy for him). Then I noticed it with food. He has not been a fan of sticky fingers or anything on his fingers for that matter. While he is eating, I typically have a cloth nearby to wipe his hands to prevent anxiety. The times we’ve played in the sand, if it gets on his hands he tries to wipe it off immediately, although he is fine using buckets and shovels. When I introduced finger-painting it was all too much and he had a bit of a meltdown, waving his hands about to get the paint off. That first try must have been a bit traumatizing for him as he didn’t even want to try the brush during future attempts. I always follow his lead for when he is ready for anything. I do not push things on him. So, we’ve stayed away from painting for a while. Although in my mama heart, I knew he wanted to do it because of the excitement he had shown before we started each project only to end with a meltdown because of how it felt on his skin. So I held onto that vision for him gently.

The other day, I gave him some honey on a spoon for a treat. After he licked a bit of it up, I watched him put his finger in the spoon and then immediately go over to the cupboard to paint the honey on the wood. He did it a few times more with a big smile on his face. Now, perhaps most mamas (rationally so) would have been a bit bummed out that their cupboards were suddenly sticky but I gasped in excitement. “Cedar!! You’re finger-painting!!”. He responded “pay-ing”…”pay-ing!!!”. It was then that I knew he was ready to explore again.

I consulted a dear circle of friends of mine that are mamas and conscious about what goes in and on their babies as far as chemicals and toxins. I wasn’t sure if Cedar was going to just eat the paint or smear the paint on his bod. I had no idea how he would explore this new texture but I wanted to feel safe for him to do so. I was encouraged by my friends to try berries and flour and water. BRILLIANT!

One of my friends thought an easel might be easier for him as far as keeping paint off of his body. We have been so accustom to doing art on our hardwood floor with paper since we don’t have a table in our home. Why hadn’t I thought of this? I was so grateful for this fresh set of ideas. So, last night we took a trip to IKEA to get an easel. We set him up this morning out on our veranda. I mixed three bowls of color: frozen raspberries with warm water and soy flour, chocolate pudding and frozen acai berries with warm water and soy flour. Such pretty colors. In fact, the colors of our wedding! ; )

It was fun to observe him. He still wanted nothing to do with the paint on his fingers. He was glad to use the brushes…and he was so serious about his art. I was expecting him to throw the paint about and smoosh it on the ground and not be able to stand and paint for too long. But he stood for over an hour and we did three different paintings and he kept asking us to join in “mama do eet!”…”daddy do!”, while handing us a brush.  Most of the time he stood there quietly by himself with the birds singing in the distance.  It reminded me of the zone he can get in when he is picking at the guitar.  So mindful of what he is doing and able to shut out the world for a while.

It was such a precious time for us as a family.

Here are a few more images…

and a wee video… ; )

{head wraps are by julie bartel over at Gypsy Wraps. giveaway for a wrap coming very soon!}